Tuesday, August 17, 2004


Happy Birthday to Ian Fermin Rosales Casocot!

Here's one person that I truly admire and respect. A person with wit, intelligence and an impeccable sense of style.

On his 29th birthday (ooops! is it a crime I mentioned your age? hehehe), I pray for a good life ahead, a life filled with love and joy. I pray for more great literary work (and hopefully a gold in the Palanca).

Be happy my friend and I know you are. Happy Birthday!

Monday, August 16, 2004


Restroom conversations are funny and it is even funnier when you are the topic of the conversation without them knowing that you are inside in one of those cubicles listening.

I had my head shaved last Friday and If you ask me how I look? With a more fit phsyique now (thanks to Slimmers World) and a shaved head, I look like a a plebe of the Philippine Military Academy. After sporting that spiky, hip haircut, some people couldn't just but help how different I look. This is true with my teammates of the Praise Team in church.

In between our early morning rehearsal and the 8:45 service in church, I went to the rest room. While I was inside the cubicle, I heard three person who came in, from their voices i recognized them as Paolo (our drummer), Joel (one of the vocalist) and Rox (our bassist). They were talking bout something else, then Paolo said, "astig talaga ang buhok ni Kuya Eric." (Don't ask me to translate astig in English). Paolo was obviously making a comment on my new hairstyle to which Joel asnwered, "well, at least it looks okay on him, at least he looks manly now." Then the three of them were laughing.

At that instant, I was tempted to go out of the cubicle and say "did I hear my name mentioned?" But I decided not to. I waited for them to went out, before I came out.

There used to be a time when I would feel terribly bad when I know people are talking about me and my sexuality. My teammates conversation, of course, insinuated on my sexuality, but i didn't feel bad. I have come to point of accepting who really I am. And if accepting who I am comes with a challenge then I am more willing to face it rather than living in denial. I have spent quite a number of years in denial that I have already grown tired of defending myself whenever the issue on my sexuality becomes the topic.

Let them talk about my sexuality, I don't care! For people can talk endless about it, but would that do me any good? I don't know, but what matters to me now is how I live my life and how I earned people's respect out of the things that I do.

People can talk about my sexuality, but as long as it won't affect the flow of money in my pocket (which for now comes in in trickles, hehehehe) or affects the things that I love to do, their conversation won't matter to me. I have learned to live with that and accept it as part of my reality.

Wednesday, August 11, 2004


I was almost tempted to react at some stupid remarks here, but William Butler Yeats reminded of more worthy things than reacting to his remarks.
by William Butler Yeats

Now all the truth is out,
Be secret and take defeat
From any brazen throat,
For how can you compete,
Being honour bred, with one
Who, were it proved he lies,
Were neither shamed in his own
Nor in his neighbours' eyes?
Bred to a harder thing
Than Triumph, turn away
And like a laughing string
Whereon mad fingers play
Amid a place of stone,
Be secret and exult,
Because of all things known
That is most difficult.

Wednesday, August 04, 2004


Probably by now you may have watch Ramona Diaz’s Documentary Film “Imelda”, or if not, you may have read quite a number of film reviews about her work, so I live the review of the film to the legitimate film critics. There are only three words I can say about “Imelda”, it’s funny, entertaining and informative (not necessarily in that order).

I watched “Imelda” twice over the weekend, first was on Saturday evening and the second time was with my Aunt Anamy on Sunday afternoon. The film features interesting interviews that the Diaz did on Imelda Marcos on the different aspect of her life. Imelda talked about her childhood, meeting and marrying Ferdinand Marcos after 11 days of whirlwind courtship, becoming the First Lady, Martial Law, the People Power, her shoes and her diamonds, her ternoes, her parties, her theories of the Good, the Truth and the Beautiful, among others. Watching the film gave you a deeper look on what’s in the mind of Imelda and how until today she is denial of any wrongs she committed to the Filipino people. Listening to her make you ponder on your life as well.

And this is what I learned - - you need “real friends”. Friends who will not just say good things about you, but who will also be kind enough to tell you your wrong and your idea sucks.

This is the trouble with Imelda, she was surrounded by people who are all trying to please her that even if her idea is the most stupid of all, they still praised her telling her how marvelous her ideas were. You just have to watched her explain her so called “Seven Portals of Peace and Order” to know what I mean. Since it seems to her that everybody was praising her for her ideas, she concluded that her idea is really great! Remember the story of the “Emperor and his New Clothes”? Imelda is very much like the Emperor. Imelda believed that her theories and ideas are great that she even wrote a book for which she said that she “presumptuously write”. The book was entitled “Circles of Life”. (If your wondering why it didn’t make it to the bestsellers list, you already know the reason)

That is why you need friends, friends who would let you go back and think of the reality, friends who help you plant your feet firmly on the ground now matter how successful and how rich you have become. Mga Kaibigang handang-handa sapakin ka para lang magising ka sa kahibangan mo. (I couldn’t say it much better but in Filipino)

And I thank God I have those friends, thank you guys and I love you!

For more about the film, click here